To Stacy…

I lost my best friend Stacy Ireti Akinyemi in 2017. We had been best friends since the 7th grade, we lived together and went to college together.

She was also my daughter’s Godmother. She was one of the first people to hold her, she came to every birthday party, they ran around and played with each other nonstop. She understood my personality more than anyone and she also shared in my shopping addiction-we would be up at random times of the night sending each other screenshots of outfits and hair ideas.

But.

We weren’t speaking for about a month when I got the call that she passed away in a car accident.

That’s the biggest regret of my life.

We were out one night celebrating another friend’s birthday and she called me selfish…for something I absolutely was being selfish about at the time but I didn’t want to hear it and I felt like she was disrespecting me.

There were so many times I felt like I should call her and apologize but my pride got in the way because I felt like I was ALWAYS the one apologizing.

Then she died and I never got the chance.

I miss her every single day. I wish I got the chance to talk to her and laugh with her again before she passed.

I say all this to say, if you love someone, if you appreciate someone, TELL THEM. If you’re not speaking to someone…let that shit go. Tomorrow isn’t promised to any of us, and once someone is gone you don’t get a do over. There is nothing that should have kept me from her, especially a stupid argument.

My daughter and I still talk about her to this day. I find myself looking at her pictures all the time and wishing/hoping/praying that she knows how much we love her.

I think that she would be proud that I finally started a blog….we always talked about how I should.

There are so many things I wish I could tell her, but she’s in heaven now.

I knew I would dedicate a post to her, and today I started thinking of her again and figured it was the perfect time.

I finally did it Stacy. I’m so sorry.

I love you, and I miss you so much.